Hello Readers!
Hello? Anybody there? I hope you didn't get frustrated with my absence this week and have quit reading. Well, if you're there, then... YAY! I hope you enjoy this week's exciting installment.
Hello Readers!
Hello? Anybody there? I hope you didn't get frustrated with my absence this week and have quit reading. Well, if you're there, then... YAY! I hope you enjoy this week's exciting installment.
Hello I.Ghost! How's it going? May as well address this directly to you since I bet you're the only one reading it. Lucky you! Feel special?
Here's this week's exciting installment.
Page 84
Page 85
These pages turned out pretty well. I like how we can see time has passed by the darkness around Mom's house, and then the transition to inside the kitchen with Lawrence cooking and lying through is teeth about his "happy childhood".
Every time I start a new page I'm a bit stumped as to what to do, but the transition from hearing the phone at the end of page 84 and then seeing it on 85 made that easy. What wasn't easy was manufacturing a way to get Lawrence outta there, and not obviously. Another smooch in the 3rd panel (tough to draw). Lawrence looks like he's turning away a bit, which helps sell the idea that something might be going on that Fancy may be oblivious to. I like how Fancy is leaning on the panel edge watching him go.
Sometimes I think the panels look too empty what with little indication of the background, however I know if I add more it will look too busy and might be confusing. It's one of those things that (if I ever get round to doing clean lines and painting it) can be managed with a swipe of colour or tone to subtly suggest a background.
I just scrolled down the page a bit and saw last week's posts, and the ones before it. It is kind of impressive how much I've done on this. I've been at it for more than a year, and there's actually something to show for it. Yay team!!
Hello, Hello, Readers... Reader!
Here we are with another exciting installment of Flight of Fancy. Do you like getting more than one page at a time as you have for the past few postings? Can't say how long that'll last because I'm running out of pages!
Ok... let's see 'em.
Page 82
Page 83
There is an idea in screenwriting that suggests you have to keep flipping events for the protagonist from positive followed by negative events, then back. Or a step forward and two steps back, then forward, which keeps your audience interested.
A similar idea in comics is that you have to leave each page on a cliff-hanger.
These techniques helps add some form or structure to the writing, which makes it easier to create and keep creating.
So with those two ideas in mind, I think I achieved these concepts leading into these pages, between them and onto the next.
About the artwork...
I don't like the last panel on 82 - the wheels on the LAV look too balloon like, too soft and squishy like a kid's toy, not tough or dangerous. Also, I think the structure is off there - the LAV looks too wide, wheels too small and the "RRRROOOOAAAR" sound FX needs to be larger.
On page 83, I don't like the bottom left panel. It is too crowded with text and the location is lost. I think it should be an establishing shot to show where the action / meeting is taking place. This would also separate the action from the courtyard where the scary (Che Guevara look alike) is. Right now, the change in location is lost, and I think it is a bit too easy to confuse Che with the one handed Papa that we saw earlier and see again here.
And what drawings do I like?!
The top two on page 82. Really nice and a nice cutting between them. I didn't want to keep drawing Lawrence on the phone, so this mixes it up and keeps the action moving forward.
I really like the location as shown on the top of page 83. I lifted (ok, stole) the idea of a large vehicle being used to open and close a gate from Escape from New York. In that movie, I think it was a bus, here I used a transport truck rig.
As usual, I like your comments and am interested to hear if they communicate the story to you.
Alo, Alo!
Here we are, on a scary Hallow'een and with two new pages! Scary action too!
Let's get right to it.
Page 80
Page 81
You will recall in the last installment, we saw the young boy and his father heading for home. The father challenged the boy to race him home, while a few short blocks away there some vehicles were racing along.
I like these pages. I think they're really dynamic. I think my favorite is the first panel on page 80 showing the truck with the machine gun in the back, and that same truck getting blown up on page 81. (Mostly) good camera angles, the drawings are good, the action (mostly) understandable.
The action was hard to stage because I wanted to show the tank thing (it's supposed to be a LAV - light armored vehicle, James. Oh, right. Thanks. It doesn't look much like one... do your reasearch!!! Sheesh, you're tough!!) shooting at the truck, but then firing across the courtyard and "tagging" the father. I do think it is clear, but I wonder if bullets into the father should come more toward camera and less from left to right.
These images show the pages as I originally drew them. If you can't see it so well, click on it and it will enlarge in the window.
I decided on the first page, last panel, to move the camera and the father's pose so that he is running toward the camera. I was hoping to make his death more surprising.
And on the other page, you can see I was trying to figure out how to show the LAV gunning down the truck and then the dad. I think the final is a little less clear, but far more impactful.
Ooh, and how do you like the circular panels? Cheesy? Do they work?
Hello Readers.
I hope you will remain readers after today... we shall see because, well...
Did I ever mention I'm terrible at telling jokes, and by extension, stories? Well, yes. Unlike you, IG, I'm one of those people who get half way through telling a joke or story when they realize that they missed delivering some pertinent information that is required to make the punchline or the story really work.
More on that after the pages.
Page 78
Page 79
Ok first, about the artwork, composition and panels on these pages. I love them. I think they turned out great. Great drawings, interesting angles, especially the last on page 79. I know it is kind of hard to see the people in the bottom right of the panel, but whether you do or not, I think the composition provides a sense of foreboding.
I get that the man in the longer tunic looks a lot like Lawrence and I agree, it can be confusing as to who this person is. I hope that will come clear as you see more pages.
I also get that there isn't much info delivered here. This sequence takes a few pages. Hang in there!
But about my deficiency as a story teller... I got to the start of page 78 and realized that I hadn't given ANY backstory to Lawrence and to make his actions clear and understandable, I was going to have to. Remember, the storyteller who didn't give pertinent information soon enough? Yep, that's me! I did it again!
Much as I didn't want to do a flashback, I couldn't see how to tell his backstory in any other way.
Ok, so for these pages and the next few, it's not a big deal, and the telling is fairly straight forward... but... UG... I gotta go back and add more backstory, which means inserting pages between ones you have already seen. I'm not sure how I'm going to do that.
I might just post those pages as usual and then tell you where they go, and then after a few weeks, add those panels into the posts so it looks all seamless like. Who will know the difference? Just you and me, IG!