Sunday 7 November 2021

What Goes Around

 Hello, Hello, Readers... Reader!

Here we are with another exciting installment of Flight of Fancy.  Do you like getting more than one page at a time as you have for the past few postings?  Can't say how long that'll last because I'm running out of pages!

Ok... let's see 'em.

Page 82

Page 83

There is an idea in screenwriting that suggests you have to keep flipping events for the protagonist from positive followed by negative events, then back.  Or a step forward and two steps back, then forward, which keeps your audience interested. 

A similar idea in comics is that you have to leave each page on a cliff-hanger. 

These techniques helps add some form or structure to the writing, which makes it easier to create and keep creating.

So with those two ideas in mind, I think I achieved these concepts leading into these pages, between them and onto the next. 

About the artwork...

I don't like the last panel on 82 - the wheels on the LAV look too balloon like, too soft and squishy like a kid's toy, not tough or dangerous.  Also, I think the structure is off there - the LAV looks too wide, wheels too small and the "RRRROOOOAAAR" sound FX needs to be larger.

On page 83, I don't like the bottom left panel.  It is too crowded with text and the location is lost.  I think it should be an establishing shot to show where the action / meeting is taking place.  This would also  separate the action from the courtyard where the scary (Che Guevara look alike) is.  Right now, the change in location is lost, and I think it is a bit too easy to confuse Che with the one handed Papa that we saw earlier and see again here.

And what drawings do I like?!

The top two on page 82.  Really nice and a nice cutting between them.  I didn't want to keep drawing Lawrence on the phone, so this mixes it up and keeps the action moving forward.

I really like the location as shown on the top of page 83.  I lifted (ok, stole) the idea of a large vehicle being used to open and close a gate from Escape from New York.  In that movie, I think it was a bus, here I used a transport truck rig.

As usual, I like your comments and am interested to hear if they communicate the story to you.

1 comment:

  1. My first thought was that this new bit of scenery really juiced your imagination. I can see your enthusiasm in these panels. They're all very fresh and dynamic. You even made picking up a box of cereal (also a very nice "I've become a jaded North American moment) dynamic!

    Yep, every frame looks great. From the kid pulling our main kid, to cutting down the alley, to the intro of the compound, to the LAV rumbling by. Dynamic!

    As for the LAV, I understand your criticisms -- but I like it. The balloony tires actually jumped out at me as being cool-looking. But I understand if they aren't heavy or imposing enough.

    Just all very, VERY well done!

    Illustrated Ghost


Thanks for your input!